Never, Ever, Ever Eat Yellow Snow: Reprint Back By Popular Demand

 (Originally posted last year, this article is back by popular demand.  And let’s face it, we could all use the reminder:  Kim)

Recently, while standing at the bottom of T-Bowl on Speed Control, a yound girl dressed in a one piece pink snowsuit stopped to ask if I had any dog cards.  "Sure," I said.  "But first you have to tell me one of the skier responsibility codes."

She looked at me blankly.

"You know," I continued.  "One of the safety rules."

She looked at her father knowingly. 

I figured they must have rehearsxed on the chairlift and she was about to say something like watch for others when merging onto a trail, or don’t go under rope lines or at the very least, always stay in control

Instead she looked straight at me and said, "Never, ever, ever eat yellow snow."

I had to admit, she had a point.  Which brings me to my issue.  Yesterday I hiked the King and at risk of sounding incredibly pet peevish, I’ll just go ahead and say it.  There were no less than ten patches of yellow snow.  I mean come on people.  Perhaps it is some kind of Kilgore Was Here mentality that comes over these guys when standing atop a spendid peak with a pristine view of Mt. Rainier (and yes I suspect that most of the culprits are, in fact, men).  Perhaps it replaces the flag that one could plant at the top of a more formidable peak.  Or maybe, as I expected the pink suited girl to say, it is an issue of staying in control. 

I don’t know.  But I do have this one plea:  please take if off the trail.  Isn’t that what bushes and trees are for?  How about this:  Just don’t make it visible.  Walk three steps off the trail and go there.  Better yet, stomp a hole in the snow, pee into it and cover it back up.  And remember, always stay in control. 


3 thoughts on “Never, Ever, Ever Eat Yellow Snow: Reprint Back By Popular Demand

  1. milo

    …there’s dog in all of us…unfortunately, some of the shared egotistical characteristics of the two-legged variety include marking territory…(and I suspect those ‘energy drinks’ make one less selective; or would that be ‘more selective’ about location…)
    now, for future clarity, should we regard your whine as ‘barking’ or ‘howling’ ?
    Respectfully, Chained


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